Sun, Sea, Sand and Saigon- the last of Vietnam...

It's been some time since my last blog post, and take that as a sign of how hectic the tail end of Vietnam was! We left Hoi An to chase the sun, as it seemed that South East Asia had not entirely escaped the weather chaos that has been going on in Japan and the Pacific. Vietnam has been unnaturally rainy for this time of year; Hanoi and the north is meant to be cold, but down the South coast, we had high hopes of the sun finally kissing us.

Our next stop on our open bus tickets was Nha Trang; a rapidly expanding beach town, with a thriving tourist industry. But along with its thriving tourism of island tours, crazy nightlife and good food, comes the dangers. We instantly heard stories from other backpackers, about muggings and pickpocketing at night-time, especially on the beach. Given my previous bad experience in Hanoi, we had our guards up and fanny packs out! The main thing to remember is not to take anything that you don't need out, and NEVER walk home alone at night, boy or girl.

So with our alerts on, we headed to the beach for our first day of proper sunbathing since we left home! Nha Trang beach was bustling, with tourists and street sellers. It was so annoying: "Lady you want bracelet? Buy some fruit? Another beer for you?" ... NOOOOO!!! GET OUT OF OUR SUN!!!! When it got too much, we wanted to cool off in the sea, but the waves were epic. Grown men (but mainly boys) were knocked off their feet by the waves hitting the shore. The Canadian boys loved it! They turned into adrenaline junkies...or even pain junkies: they couldn't get enough. Us girls stayed well away!

As for our tans? Pfft, if only burnt skin was in fashion. We're not sure whether our malaria tablets made it worse, but our burn was tragic. I'd even been putting factor 50 on every 20 minutes. My pale skin took a beating and the sweats began...

We were lucky to meet with our lovely Irish friends for dinner and hitting the town. Food was considerably more expensive here, but the drinks deals were flowing along the main street towards the beach club. Dolled up Vietnamese girls would drag Westerners into their bars for the free beer or cocktail during Happy Hour and the music poured out onto the streets. Oasis Bar, Why Not? Bar, and the Sailing Club were the main stops of each night out, and our first night fell on the Full Moon.

After hours of sweaty, non-stop dancing at Sailing Club's Full Moon Beach Party, I stumbled home with Rachel and Sinead, craving a sandwich, but spotting faults with EVERY street stall: suspect meat or crawling ants! We made it home safe and happy.

Sadly, the same couldn't be said for Sean. He'd walked home by himself, only being a  few blocks away and had been approached by a prostitute offering her services. He declined, but she backed him into a corner, and before he knew it, her two male friends had jumped him, knocking him to the floor and holding a gun to his stomach. He threw them his remaining cash, which they scrambled on the floor for, and then ran. Obviously he was shaken up, making it home in one piece, but it scared us all. My view of Nha Trang had been tainted. One bad experience can ruin a whole opinion, and it really is a shame.

We still ended up going out 3 of the nights, but always being careful and walking home in groups. Vinpearl Island: Nha Trang's huge water theme park resort, was top of our list for day trips. It was awesome! We took a cable car from the mainland for 30mins out over the sea towards the huge, white,  Hollywood-style 'VINPEARL' sign erected on the lush green island. Once there, we were confronted by rollercoasters, arcades, and a great selection of waterslides which kept us busy for about 8 hours! We ran around like little children, playing on the arcade games, watching 4D films, and spinning on the teacups. It was brilliant! We didn't get to go on all the slides, as they had some strange traffic light system going, where only half the rides were open at one time, but we were all slid out by the end.

It was the end of Nha Trang for us, and we headed off to Mui Ne (the quieter beach option) for a bit of sun lounging and treating ourselves. It was a lot quieter, and almost too quiet compared to Nha Trang! A tiny beach town, spread along 10 km of white sands, famous for watersports and the nearby picture perfect sand-dunes.

We embraced the laid back atmosphere and chilled by the beach with some new buddies we met on the bus. After an early night of a couple of Tiger beers on the beach, we set off for our sand dune adventure! Typically, the weather was a disappointment again. it wasn't raining, but it was windy and i mean gale force windy, especially on the dunes!

Before the dunes we stopped off at a smelly but picturesque fishing village, and the fairy streams. Annabel paid to ride an Ostrich, but my conscience kicked in when I saw the small pen and the lack of feathers on the bird's wings. I know I rode an elephant in Chiang Mai, so maybe its double standards, but I just wouldn't enjoy it! Give me one in the wild, running through the dunes...and I'll be game!

The dunes were awesome! It was still cloudy, and we didn't get our Kodak Sunset as promised, but it was still an experience. It was too painful for my liking though, as the wind caused the sand to whip us in the face and body, constantly. There was sand in my ears, my eyes, my mouth and nose. It was like taking a physical beating from the sand! We even went sand boarding down the dunes, me head first, and got sand all the way down my front. But...it was worth it! After many cliched 'jump' photos in front of our cloudy sunset...we headed home and crashed, ready and rested for Saigon.

Saigon, where do I start? Well, I won't bore you with too much history, as there is so much to tell. The important thing to know, is that after the communists beat Southern Vietnam during the war, Saigon was renamed Ho Chi Minh City, after you know who! Bar the few remaining French named roads (after famous Frenchmen like Louis Pasteur) all the roads were renamed also. HCMC underwent huge renovations under the communist rule, and is often described as a city of great contrasts due to its spectrum of communist ideology and thriving capitalist culture.

We were both instantly impressed with the city. It could be likened to Hanoi, but it was cleaner and less packed. The street were quite wide, and whilst the traffic was still typically Vietnamese (ie. mental) it was easier to deal with than up in the capital. What was also quite good for us, was that there was a main backpacker area with all the hostels and cheap restaurants! We stayed on Bui Vien at Thaun Anh Guest House, where we were loved by the Vietnamese women running it. This was partly because they thought we were beautiful, but mainly because they thought we were hilarious due to a cockroach incident...

Annabel and I were getting ready for an early bedtime, and getting undressed (it was so hot in our room that we were sleeping topless), when I look on the floor and see a HUGE cockroach. "BAAAAAAAAAAAH!" I screamed, as there is one thing that really grosses me out, and that is cockroaches. Spiders can be creepy, wasps I just avoid, but cockroaches are the scum of the earth! There was no way I could sleep knowing that a cockroach was there. For one thing, they fly! Nope, I was getting help. So I ran down stairs (clothed obviously), all red in the face and attempted to explain my predicament to the two women. It turns out that the Vietnamese don't understand the word 'cockroach', so in my panic I did the most ridiculous impression of a cockroach that I could think of, putting my hands together and wiggling my fingers franticly through the air. The women just stared at me in amusement. Eventually one of them got it, and followed me upstairs with a can of pesticide. Despite spraying the bugger, and leaving us in peace, the lady did not kill our unwanted roomate. I'd finally calmed down when it only flew out from behind a bed and landed on my pillow! I flipped again, and after Annabel's futile attempts and killing it by throwing a flip flop, went back down to get our lady. This time, it took two of them. One of them used a bag to pick it up in one swoop from my pillow, while the other laughed and looked under beds. "Not your friend?!" they laughed as we both cowered in the corner of our beds. They said we were ok, but after they left, I wasn't so sure...

Of course there was another! Scuttling out from my bag. I screamed again (and yes, by this time, even I thought I was being pathetic) and the women actually heard me from downstairs and came to our aid. They pounced on the creature with their bare hands, and found another before leaving. "We are moving rooms!" I said...and luckily, the next day, we did. Still, we were pretty famous at the hotel, and despite the minor infestation, we still loved the place.

We got our bearings and explored the city, hitting the market first of course. I finally got the hang of bartering and got myself some jewellry and some 'Weasel' coffee (made through a weasel, if you get my drift). It's an easy city to get around, and within a day we'd walked along our own little tour, including the main sights of the Reunification Palace and the famous War Remnants Museum.

This was the main place of intrigue for me. We'd met the Irish girls again the night before, and heard just how emotional the photographs and information in this museum was, that it moved some people to tears. Being a history geek, I was still itching to get there. Outside the building, were American tanks and fighter planes, and an outdoor replica of the horrific tiger cages (prisons of torture). Inside the museum, were the main exhibitions depicting the untold horrors and casualties of the war. 'Requiem' by Vietnam photojournalist Tim Page, showed a collection of war photographs taken by international journalists, wanting to portray the lesser seen footage of the war.

The scenes depicted were heartbreaking. Photographs of women, children and babies, piled up dead on the ground almost brought me to tears. Snapshots of devastated villages torn apart by flaming bombs, and peasant civilians kneeling on the ground, pleading with soldiers, moments before being shot. There was a whole exhibition dedicated to highlighting the dangers of Agent Orange (chemical bombs including Dioxin) showing the long-term effects on the Vietnamese people. Children today are still being born with disabilities due to their grand parents being subjected to the gases. This was what was so unique about the museum: it didn't glorify the weapons, planes, or soldiers but showed the real tragedy of war, pain and death.

It was an exhausting experience, but well worth it. The next day we had the Cu Chi tunnels, where we played out the roles of the Viet Cong and explored the vast underground network of tunnels, built as a stronghold against the American troops. Full of bamboo boobie traps, and hidden passages, these tunnels were home to the local Viet Cong soldiers, who could navigate their way around and trick the opposition. We climbed through the 200m long tunnel underground, sweating in the heat, but ploughing on through the claustrophobia (the tunnels had even been made bigger for tourists so I dread to think how much smaller they were!). As a touristy gimic, we treated ourselves to 5 bullets each in an AK47 at the shooting range! We were AWESOME! It was a very cool day, and we feel a lot more educated now!

Obviously there was still drinking. Saigon's nightlife was a little too expensive though. We had a couple of good ones in the backpacker area, and explored one of the weird Vietnamese nightclubs, but it wasn't a patch on Nha Trang or Hanoi.

Anyway, thats a wrap for Vietnam! It's been eventful and jam packed for sure, but it still wasn't what we expected. For a country that has had so much war and political turmoil, Vietnam is becoming a lot more touristy. Good for Vietnam I guess, but we thought we'd see a lot more local villages and get down and dirty. Still, it's the backpacker trail, and it's been a hell of a lot of fun. So now all that has to be said is...GOOD EVENING VIETNAM!!!!

Tailor-made Days and 'Lame' Nights - Bye Bye Budget, Hello Hoi An.

The small coastal town of Hoi An is Vietnam's answer to a shopaholic's mecca. Many a Westerner has parted with a hefty wad of cash, in order to get their retail fix, and purchase a custom made wardrobe. As two shopaholics stuck with a backpacker's budget, Annabel and I were apprehensive about our time here, to say the least.

We'd heard from our friends that this place was addictive.You pick anything, and I mean anything, out of a magazine, and the best value tailors in Vietnam will make you your own custom fitted copy. We were excited!

I think my main regret with Hoi An, was not having a proper idea of what I really needed...This became my downfall, as if I liked what I saw, I got one fitted for me. Oh, my poor poor budget.

Most Westerners make the most of Hoi An's good value, by getting suits, jackets and smart dresses made. I thought this was a good place to start, as I know too well how expensive suits can be back at home. So, I got a lovely matching grey trouser and blazer suit made, for the job I don't yet have (one can only hope). All my measurements were taken, and I handpicked the fabric, and the lining, and showed a photograph of exactly how I wanted my blazer. I was still apprehensive: I'm very fussy about how my trousers look on me, and I still had little faith. We were told that our suits would be ready for fitting the next morning, and for collection in the evening, so we paid a deposit, and set off to kill time in the town.

Unluckily, the cold weather had followed us down from Hanoi, and we only had one afternoon of good sunshine on the beach. The worst part of this, was that all we had to do in the day was, well, shop. I ended up getting two dresses, one tailor made, the other just bought, 3 DVD's and leather boots in total. Whoops. I would have felt worse, but the Canadians spent about $300 each in three days. I kept to about $120, but the leather boots were a must. Tailor made to fit my horrible ugly feet. In my favourite colour of tan leather, with my own thickness of heel, and darker leather lining. The best part of it? Only $25. Hello bargain! Happy Steph.

Meanwhile, whilst all this shopping was going on during the day, you may ask what we did at night. Hoi An is definately not famous for its nightlife, with only a few choice bars and not really enough people to make a party.

But what Hoi An didn't realise, was that Team Englanada was going to have an almighty reunion. We bumped into Andy, Luke and Jonathan, and told them to come for dinner with us in the evening. We discovered a little gem called 'Lame' Cafe - and it was far from boring. The staff would welcome us from the pavement with a loud "HELLO!" and a frantic wave. We took one look at the cheap prices, and were sold.

I had the best Vietnamese style spring rolls that I have ever had (and that is some claim!) with crispy rice paper and cut up shrimp inside. They were so crunchy and not at all greasy. There was some serious food envy at the table that night. Yet the main selling point of Lame Cafe was the 3,000 VND draught beer (that's about 10 pence for half a pint) which you could go up and hand pour yourself. Put that together with the Halong Bay reunion, and it was a party! The staff loved it. We were chanting and clapping away with our drinking games, and gradually got merry enough to head out discover the night life.

We jumped into a free mini bus from the main bar in town, and were taken to the beach party. Here it seemed that every young person in Hoi An and come out to play. I danced and sang for hours, staining my tongue yellow from the buckets, joined in with the Aussie sprinkler dances and ran away from the offers of a "moustache ride" (don't ask). Turns out that you can make a party anywhere in Vietnam, with the right people and the right drink.

The same fun followed for the next two nights, including St. Patrick's Day. Annabel and I were sad to not be with our favourite Paddies in Nha Trang, but made sure we celebrated in their honour by donning green, and drinking as if we were in an Irish pub. Needless to say, at the end of these few days, we craved sobriety and culture. Our wallets ached, and our colds suffered.

To make it all worth while, our suits turned out great, the boots were perfect, and we have some hilarious photos. Hoi An, you've done us proud. Money well spent. 

It's not all a bunch of roses...

After the three days of luxury and fun in Halong Bay, we were thrown back into the whirlwind Hanoi. We'd checked in at the same place as Canada, in the buzzing Hanoi Backpackers Hostel. We showered and ate, and headed out into town, to explore Hanoi's night life further.

Really, this was unnecessary, as we had had our fun in Halong Bay, plus the 'ladies night' before! Yet, Annabel, Brendan and I ventured out to find Temple Bar (a must visit, full of locals and dodgy licensing laws!).

Sure enough we found it, albeit not easily, having to climb under the silver shutters, subtly opened up by a man outside. Once inside, we were 3 out of about 9 Westerners in this narrow, sweaty, crowded club. We embraced it, like with everything else, and danced around like crazy people. Two beefed up American body builders approached us, and fawned over our 'sexy' British accents. Now, I'm not one for judging by stereotype, but these two were EXACTLY the reason why American travellers get bad press out here. Loud, arrogant, and brassy. One was sporting interesting tattoos on each arm, which I overheard him describing:

"This one means TRUTH and this one means JUSTICE...cos that's the only thing that matters buddy!"

Nice. It was about this point when all the music was cut. We started to look around in confusion, as we'd only just got here! I was informed by one of the Vietnamese partiers that the police had turned up wanting to shut the place down. So that was it for us! Or so we thought...

We were recommended to head to Lighthouse Club by the river. It was a bit of mission, so the "best" way to get there was by xe om (motorbike taxis). This didn't sit well with me at all. I'd heard all sorts of warnings about these vigilante motorbikers mugging people in dark streets and taking advantage of tourists. Yet I was egged on by my group. I was assured that I'd be ok with one of the boys, so I went with it.

Big mistake.

All the way, I was freaking out about the driver. He wasn't focusing on the road, and kept looking behind at me. I kept telling him to look forward and actually held his head to face the front! My friend Carlo, found it funny how much I was freaking out, and I suppose I laughed too, trying to get past my gut fear.

Alarm bells started to ring when the bike took a right down the main road: the opposite direction to the club as written on my map. I alerted Carlo, but we were dropped off in a really bad looking area. No lights. No cars. No people. I started to argue with driver, insisting that we had to go up a back a few streets as he was going the wrong way. We moved up a few more, before we stopped again. By this time, I'd had enough. I told Carlo we were getting off here before he did anything bad.

We got off the bike and I checked my bag: it was wide open. I instantly did the spot check: camera, phone, wallet...

"Wallet. Carlo, he's got my wallet!" It was gone. The guy was just starting to turn his bike engine back on, to drive away, when I flipped! I don't know what came over me, but my alarm bells rang, my heart raced, and I ran after him, screaming "GIVE ME MY WALLET BACK!".

I saw him throw the wallet to the ground, with my cards still in it, but all my cash gone. My cards weren't enough. I had my dollars in there too, and by this stage I'd worked out that this guy didn't have the best escape strategy. Carlo and I went running after him. I grabbed onto his bike, which was swaying all over the place, and pulled him to the ground.

The biker didn't know what had hit him! I grabbed at his jacket, even tearing the sleeve, whilst Carlo held him back. I saw my last opportunity, and swooped into his jacket pocket grabbing any cash I could find. Carlo let the guy go, while I looked sadly at my handful of petty cash.

It then came crashing back down on me. I broke down into uncontrollable tears. I was inconsolable. Here we were, lost, alone in some tiny street in the suburb of Hanoi. A small group of local women crowded round me, looking worried, as I looked a state. Carlo was panicking a bit, and urged me to get up and get out!

It was tough, and to cut a long and horrible experience short, we made it back safely. Not at all sound, but safe. Annabel had been fine on her bike, and had made it to the club, but her homing device alerted her to come back to find me! We were all ok, and I was carted off to a bar, over Carlo's shoulder, to buy my a bucket.

I slept safe in my bed that night, and woke up feeling lucky, but these things just remind you, that no matter how great your travels may be, they can still turn ugly. We're safe and still loving life, but we have lessons to learn. I for one, will be steering well clear of motorbike taxis at night, and will never take all my money out in one go.

But the main lesson to be learnt? Always trust your gut.

"Oh My Buddha!" - Caves, Karaoke and Captain Jack, it's Halong Bay.

After the hectic buzz of Hanoi, we couldn't have asked for anything more peaceful and easy as Halong Bay. Campaigning to become one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the world, Halong Bay is a group of rocky islands, full of caves, quiet beaches, and national parks.

Whilst being so naturally beautiful, Halong Bay has quickly become a main tourist destination for North Vietnam, which many different tour companies and hostels offering standard package tours - which to us would normally scream out "rip off!". If we were going to do a tour, we wanted it to be worth it, but its always such a gamble out here. Also, due to the weather being disappointing, we were so worried that we'd either be stuck on a boat that was dirty, with rubbish food and annoying guides, or just that we were on a boat with 'weirdos'.

For once, our luck was in! It was honestly the best couple of days that we've had out here so far. The tour was such good value. Three delicious meals a day with rice, seafood, noodles and spring rolls (and MAYONNAISE!!!), the most comfortable beds we've slept in since we left, and a brilliant tour guide nicknamed 'Captain Jack'. Despite the weather, the views were still stunning. It was an arguably better view, with a slight mist covering the peaks of the many islands erupting from the water's surface: slightly more like something out of Pirates of The Caribbean. Captain Jack (Sparrow) was great fun, and taught us a lot about Halong Bay.

We walked through the huge caves, looking in wonder at the many strange shapes that some of the coves and peaks. Captain Jack said that many peaks could look like animals or shapes, depending on the strength of your imagination. His big surprise was a rather majestic 'peak' that he likes to call the "Good Morning Rock" - I'll leave you to work that one out! It really was amazing how huge the caves were, and all formed naturally. Jack told us a little about the ancient tales about Halong, which means "Descending Dragon", and how the Vietnamese and Chinese soldiers used to hide in the caves for safety during the war.

We kayaked in the drizzle, freezing our legs off, but marveled at the little floating villages, where communities spend their lives on water - some never setting foot on land. Quite shocking to think about, but fascinating too.

The first night was spent on the boat. After recent tragedy of a tour boat sinking in Halong Bay, we tried to push those thoughts to the back of our heads, and enjoy the luxury! It was in the evening that we met the rest of our group. And what a bloody brilliant group it was!

We were already with the three English boys, Andy, Luke and Jonathan, but were introduced to the Canadians: Sean, Brendan, Tiane and Shane. Such a great group of guys (and the outnumbered girl) who got the entire group of Swiss, Spanish and American all sitting around a table playing drinking games. Annabel and I took control of the organised fun, and the Canadians took control of the drinking! It was a great night, and made us two really glad to have booked that particular tour, as we had feared an anti social boat!

The next morning was a little painful. Lucky for us we had fresh air, cycling and Monkey Island and beach bungalows awaiting us. We played soccer (wannabe football) on the beach with England vs. Canada. Sadly, I was on Team Canada, but I like to think that I carried the team to victory! After breaking up a ridiculous sweat, it was time to climb to the monkeys! And when I say climb, I mean pretty much vertical. Not the easiest, but worth it to feed a cheeky monkey.

That night, despite the tiredness, we partied again. This time it was only Team Englanada (just made that up), but with one extra asset: karaoke. Now, I'm not the biggest fan of karaoke, as I suffer from a low cringe threshold, but give me a couple of cheap beers and I'm up there singing "In The Jungle", "I'm Too Sexy" and fancying myself as the new Stevie Nicks. It was a great night, once again, and the next day Bells and I began to feel like we were going to miss these guys...

We were very sad to leave Halong Bay. Yes, we spent most of the time a little cold and a lot hungover, but we made some great new friends, saw some beautiful sights, and ate too much good food. Worth $98 for three days of luxury? I think so. Oh my buddha, take me back to Halong Bay...

Pineapple Scams and Motorbike Madness - Hello Hanoi.

Oh Bangkok, you are a now a mere pussycat in my eyes. Bearing in mind that I'm still scared of cats, you can be safe to assume that Hanoi is the most mental city that I've ever tried to navigate.

Hanoi for me has been a mixed bag, full of loves and hates. "A city of sharp contrasts" (as quoted by Lonely Planet) now doesn't quite do the place justice. It should say: a city where you take your life in your hands every time you cross the street, where little old Vietnamese women will scam you out of 90,000 dong for two bags of pineapple, but a city that still charms with its quaint little streets, ancient green shaded pagodas and cosmopolitan eateries and stores.

We didn't get off to the greatest of starts in Vietnam's capital. After being dropped off at the international bus station, which didn't appear to be anywhere on the map we had, we were taken into the city by a taxi sporting the classic 'double speed' meter. I had just read about these taxis before we got off the bus, but we were still trapped in a taxi charging through the roof for a journey which we didn't know the distance of. A classic scenario in travelling. It's just another thing we had to deal with.

Yet we slowly started to get the hang of it: you just walk and hope for the best. It sounds ridiculous, but the only time I almost caused an accident, was when I stopped and hesitated! They will not wait for you to cross- but they will avoid you.

We hunted down a tasty meal, after surviving on crackers and plastic cheese sandwiches on the bus. We were charmed by the bustling beer quarter, with various generations of locals sitting out on little plastic chairs, enjoying a cheap Beer Hoi and watching the traffic fly by. It's a city full of buzz, full of exotic and not always good smells, and you rarely come across an empty street.

Our hostel was great: recommended by an Aussie bar tender in Laos, we headed to 'The Drift'. Lovely clean dorm rooms, with two showers, lockers, free breakfast and internet: everything we needed to get back to our reality again. It was a good base to have, away from the constant chaos of Hanoi's traffic system.

In recent years the beautiful and cosmopolitan Hanoi has been overcome by motorcyclists, creating floods of constant traffic, leaving little room for pedestrians. Motorcycling has become the main way of travel in Vietnam, and Hanoi leads the trend.

We felt on our second day, that once you embrace the chaotic Hanoi, you enjoy it. It did help that it was much cooler here, so that we didn't have to deal with sweat as well as traffic. We jam packed our day full of a walking tour of the sights. 

As a closet history geek, I was particularly happy to hunt down Ho Chi Minh's mausoleum. Once Annabel was aware that Ho Chi Minh was not "just a city", we were both excited to go to see the body of Vietnam's greatest hero: Uncle Ho. 

When we arrived, we were ushered in a regimented fashion of two by two, along a painted white line on the street. This was the resting place of Vietnam's most beloved leader, so naturally there was a strict military feel to the compound. Ho Chi Minh campaigned for the freedom of Vietnamese people, and a unified Vietnam. Possibly, one of the worlds most famous leaders, I was itching to see his body, preserved in a huge tomb built from grey marble. There was an evocative if not eerie silence inside the tomb, as passers by gazed upon the tiny white bearded body of Ho. 

I felt strangely insignificant, as this wasn't my national hero, but I could see the looks of admiration on the Vietnamese tourists as they looked upon their great leader. Annabel was a little freaked out that they keep his body on show, but with someone so idolized as Ho Chi Minh, you'd expect nothing less. 

Wandering around the city later in the afternoon, was when I had my pineapple incident. It almost ruined my day! We were walking along after a nice roof top lunch, when we were ambushed by these two little women in their conical hats, holding the hanging baskets of pineapple over their shoulders. One of them put the hat and pineapple on Annabel for a photo-op. This was our first naive mistake! Photos are never free in Vietnam! Almost the oldest trick in the book. After the same was done to me, we found ourselves paying for pineapple that we didn't really want. Yet, we didn't realise that it was about to be a more expensive bag of pineapple than our 2 course dinner the night before! I gave in with the woman at 50,000 dong (around one pound seventy) but handed her a 100,000 note expecting change. Well, that wasn't going to happen! She sneakily gave me a tenner back, and ran away cursing an me and shouting as she did it. It was such a spectacle, that it took me a minute to realise how much I'd just been scammed out of! I was fuming. Annabel had to stay out of my way for a good fifteen minutes, poor thing. 

Eventually I calmed down and realised how little money it was to me at home. It was more my pride that took a beating than my budget. Anyway, we carried on exploring, and went to see the water puppet show at the theatre. This was an interesting experience too, and one which I didn't actually expect to enjoy! 

Puppets freak me out. Just like clowns. And going along with all the good luck I'd been having recently, where were our seats? Front row, middle. Brilliant. 

Like I said, though, the show was really cool. The little hand crafted wooden puppets were on horizontal stilts, being moved from behind a screen at the back. They danced and moved around the pool of water, to a  less cool soundtrack of Vietnamese folk music, sometimes squirting water or jumping through rings of fire. It was a much better show than we expected! 

After a measly dinner of bread and cheese (to make up for the pineapple disaster) we headed over Hanoi Backpackers Hostel, to meet a couple of guys we'd bumped into earlier in the day. It was National Woman's Day in Vietnam, so the hostel was doing a 241 deal on cocktails for women...or men braving a dress, as you do. It was a brilliant night! We only expected to go for a couple of drinks, but we got into the swing of the party, and just had to accompany all the 'ladies' across town to the beer quarter. I couldn't wait to see the reaction on the streets to a group of cross dressing Westerners walking along the street. 

It was hilarious. I never felt safer crossing the road in Hanoi, as I did that night, as the traffic literally stopped. People on motorbikes stopped in the middle of the road to capture the spectacle on their phones. Kids ran alongside the boys in dresses slapping their bums and giving them cone hats to wear. It was brilliant. I was really starting to like Hanoi...good times.

Next stop was a leisurely boat cruise to the famous Halong Bay. We booked the tour through a company recommended by some boys we met at Ho's mausoleum. So we were excited for a little bit of all inclusive luxury! 

The Sleeper That Never Sleeps - Vientiane to Hanoi

After three days of feeling disgusting, dirty, and sorry for ourselves, Vientiane was refreshing.  Granted, for a capital city, there was NOTHING to do, but we enjoyed sitting about being, well, sober.

We ate, drank coffee, wrote our journals, and enjoyed feeling a little bit more continental, as Vientiane is very French. The weather was immense too, and even if we had a day of activities planned, we wouldn't have been able to see it through. So really, it was just recuperation until the looming bus journey from hell, to Hanoi.

Boy, were we thrown in at the deep end. As our first experience of a sleeper bus, on a full twenty six hour journey, we were already fairly nervous. When we were dropped off at the international bus station, we were ambushed by Lao people ushering us onto a bus. To put the proverbial cherry on top, we were less than happy to discover that we were the only Westerners on the bus. Every other passenger was Lao or Vietnamese, so bar one Korean man who tried to befriend us, we were very much alone. 

What exactly could we do now? We had no choice but to start our steady stream of prayers to the man above, begging for an easy and safe journey. We just had to deal with it. 

As it turned out, the journey was bearable. Only just. We were sat between a group of Vietnamese boys who kept staring and laughing at us every now and then, but trusting my gut instinct, I felt they meant no harm. The whole way through the mammoth journey, we were sitting in our reclined pods, trying to block out the soul destroying Lao pop videos and dodgey, dubbed Kung Fu films, and trying to get some shut eye. Surprisingly, we managed it, and stole about four or five hours of bad sleep before I realised we'd been parked outside the border crossing all night.

All the buses that had left the station at Vientiane were parked in a line behind us, waiting for the border crossing to open. What a waste of time!!! We could have had 5 hours cut off our journey if we'd left later on, but who knows why things work the way they do out here. It's all part of the game. 

Passport control was an interesting experience as always. Having been through border crossings in Central America, I knew what sort of thing to expect. Annabel, however, was completely dazed by the experience. We pushed through the crowds to get our passports seen first, and were then directed up the road, by a simply shooing gesture, to find immigration. We walked up the muddy pathway in the drizzle, in our little flip flops, hoping that the weather up in North Vietnam wasn't going to be like this all the time, missing sunny Laos already. We fought through the Laos bus drivers trying to fast track the immigration process, as much to Annabel's frustration, they have no idea about the very British prospect of queuing. Not here. Not ever, Bells.

We survived the border and were eager to get back in the warm, sticky bus, just so we could get back to sleep and skim past the next ten hours. Unfortunately for us, there was more than the Kung Fu films and Lao ring tones to combat, but the almost constant blaring of the bus's three tiered horn! Seriously, every two minutes we were disrupted from our sleep from this ridiculous noise. As we have discovered, the highway code in South East Asia is pretty much "As long as you beep them, anything goes". 

In the end, I'm happy to report, that we survived the bus, the music, the Kung Fu, the border, and the incessant horn, to say "GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!". A new country, a new blank slate, and a whole new pool of sharks to be thrown into. God, I love travelling... 

In The Tubing - Vang Vieng and too many buckets.

After being so well behaved since being away, we decided to finally let our hair down and spoil ourselves with a three day party. That could only mean one thing...Vang Vieng.

Vang Vieng is Lao's answer to Ibiza or Magaluf. Hundreds of tourists pass through the small town in the Vientiane Province, where the streets are lined with cafes playing endless episodes of Friends or Family Guy, and where Western drinking cultures are let loose.

Our first impression of Vang Vieng was that it was a lot smaller than we expected, and strangely quieter. Dance music played loudly from a couple of empty bars, but there were only a few haggered looking Westerners slumped on the sofas in cafes staring blankly at the current Friends episode on offer. Annabel and I were with Lucy and Emily, who'd caught the bumpy bus with us from Luang Prabang, and we set off for food after checking in to our hotel.

We wondered where all the tourists were, as it was about 7pm and the place was too empty. We were served by a waiter who was definately on something that wasn't on the menu...

But after ordering our various fried rice dishes, we began to notice the steady influx of drunk, half naked, and bedraggled looking tourists. Maybe steady is a poor choice of word, as they swayed, staggered and stumbled across the streets, pen all over faces and bodies, and chanting at the tops of their voices.

"Now THIS is what I was expecting" we all said, right before a drunk, incoherent Canadian decided to sit with us and demand Annabel's food. Needless to say, she put him right in his place, he called her a bitch and left, stumbling right into the middle of the road. We mocked and judged these ridiculous people, falling about in the street but having a great time.

Just twenty four hours later...and we had become the stereotypical, dirty, sweaty, drunk tuber.

It was an awesome day. The sun beat down on us and after going to purchase the standard tubing t-shirts and waterproof pouches, we set off to join the party. Even though most people don't actually rent the big rubber rings to float down the river half the time, we wanted to get the real experience. It was a tough deal. Even though you paid 55,000 kip to rent the ring in the first place, you also have to pay a 60,000 deposit. If for some reason you do not make it back to the store by 6pm with a ring, you lose that deposit. We were sure that we wouldn't let that happen...and set off to start the drinking.

To summarise the day, (as I can't do the whole experience justice) we went up to the river, lined with treetop bars, throwing ropes out the thirsty tubers, and persuading them to use their 30 ft rope swings and precarious water slides, whilst handing out free shots of dodgy Lao whiskey and booming out modern dance tunes.

It was so much fun! We had got there early on, so started on the beers and danced around in the fourth bar down. Lucy and Emily braved the tree swing, with poor Emily belly flopping into the water on her first go, bruising her thighs down to her knees. That was me out of the picture! There was no way I was attempting a swing, not with the horror stories I'd heard and Emily hurting herself without even drinking! But I was a minority, as throughout the day boys and girls would swing, do back flips, and dive into the sometimes dangerously shallow river. We were happy to dance and sing, swigging our buckets of Mojito and soaking up the sun, before ungracefully climbing into our tubes and floating off down to the next stop.

We didn't even get half way down! It was about half 5 so we freaked out about our deposit and got the next tuk tuk back to the store. How good it felt to be handed 60,000 kip back! We were drenched, and starving hungry...so the next logical step was a burger and Family Guy. I hate Family Guy, but stared blankly at the screen while polishing off a greasy cheeseburger, with extra fries and most importantly, a lot of mayo.

We'd become what we had mocked.
Did we care? Of course not.

Two more days of hedonistic partying in the sun followed. We ditched the tubes and walked the banks of the river instead. This actually proved to be far more chaotic for me, as after one too many free shots of whiskey, I slipped and sprained me ankle on the dark walk home. I felt like a fool the next day, but it turns out that I got off lucky!

People break ribs, break legs, cut faces, need stitches and generally get in a bad bad shape. So I looked on the bright side: I bought some new $2 Havaianas to replace the ones I lost and went to start it all again, celebrating Annabel's twenty second birthday!

It was much of the same. Hot sun, lots of drinking, dancing, flip-cup, slides, and not passing out at 10.30pm (Annabel Hartle). We never actually made it out to the bars in the evening (explaining why we thought it so quiet on our first night) but we finally thought it best to leave sweet but dangerous Vang Vieng. It would slowly kill us...and we craved to be fresh and clean once more. I craved to walk properly again. So we said our farewells to the wonderful people that we'd met and partied with on the river, and caught the next bus to Vientiane.

Goodbye my crazy Vang Vieng: it's certainly been an experience...

 

Luang Prabang - Alms-giving and a discoteque.

Luang Prabang (LPB) is probably the most visited city in Laos. Vientiane, the capital, does not offer much in the way of tourist attractions, so LPB is the main city stop on the backpacker trail. I'd heard many a good thing about the city, but was surprised as to how small it actually was.

I had expected something a little more like the buzzing but laid back Chiang Mai, with everything a lot more spread out. Yet Luang Prabang eventually gave us that vibe we were looking for. We ventured out into the night market, where the atmosphere was a lot like that in Chiang Mai's Night Bazaar. There were street vendors selling food, shakes, jewelry, scarves, bags (the usual crafts), and there was an impressive selection of restaurants.

When the group headed to take out some kip, we found that the ATMs were a nuisance. Another frustrated westerner explained that Laos has some serious issues with Western cards. VISA is not as widely accepted as we had hoped, and it was generally easier to get cash out from an exchange desk. We were prepared for this sort of problem, so when we took cash out, we took A LOT!

As for our budgets, we also found that Laos was not that cheap for such a poor country. We wonder that if the average wage of a waiter in a restaurant was 15,000 kip per day (as was printed discreetly at the bottom of most menus), then how did they afford to live when one bottle of water is about 6,000 and simple noodles are 10,000? Those cynics among us believe that they have a 'western price' and a 'local price', as the maths just doesn't work out!

Back to LPB. We had a lovely day wandering around the town, seeing pretty much everything there was to see. A couple of temples, restaurants, the river (we'd seen quite enough of that by then though) and the various restaurants and bars. We covered it all in a day by foot, to give you an idea of the size. As for activities, most of which were located outside of the town. We did consider doing a trek, but after the first day we realised that due to budgets, we should move on quickly.

However, we did have a brilliant night out on the town! We found some great little bars with cheap cocktails for us girls, and moved onto the Hive bar (coincidence?!) where we charmed the bar tender, Dan. He loved our Englishness...yet kept saying "maaaaate" in a very Aussie accent. He convinced us that we should head to the discoteque for a dance, and by this stage, we couldn't think of anything better! So we met the boys and piled into a dodgy tuk tuk for the 1km drive out of town to a warehouse type club. We were the only white people there! It was great! They played non stop dodgy pop songs, and sold us a bottle of vodka, as they didn't sell it by the measure. Yeah right! But we fell for it, like drunken fools. We danced the night away with Dan and his other Lao friends, who seemed totally thrilled to be in our presence!

After that, the rest of a night was a bit of a blur...but the photos tell us that we were a little rowdy at the hostel but it was all clean safe fun. The next day...was painful. We slept, ate, and sat about really. Oh but the veggie buffet was the highlight! 10,000 kip for all you can fit on a plate, and it was good.

To make up for our lack of cultural exploration on the hangover day, we decided to get up at 5.30 am the following morning to go to alms giving in town. Yes, we didn't think we'd actually get up either, but you always surprise yourself!

Alms giving in Luang Prabang has been a common cultural and spiritual practice for many many years. It has now become one of the main tourist attractions also, where tourists are invited to kneel at the side of the road, and take part in the giving of rice and food to the monks. I had done my research online, and found that the ritual can often go wrong for tourists, as they are unaware of the cultural etiquette. As a woman particularly, it is important that you do not touch the monks, or their bowls, and they cannot look at you whilst the ritual is taking place. Obviously we had to dress respectfully, but the main food that you buy from vendors to give to monks is Laos sticky rice and bananas, so it was best to use that only. All of this made us quite nervous! We didn't want to mess up and offend anyone, but it all went very smoothly. I was shocked at how many monks there were! My rice ran out very quickly, so I stepped aside and watched the procession of orange robes from a distance.

The alms that the monks receive are eaten at two points during the morning, and after midday they are allowed only water. So I was shocked to see some of the monks taking food from their own bowls and giving it to the begging children at the side of the road. It was a very moving and rewarding experience, despite being totally exhausted for the rest of the day! I am very proud of us though, and would recommend it to anyone.

All in all our time in LPB was enjoyable, and very hot. Now we move on to Vang Vieng, for the tubing experience. At this point we doubt that we will be doing anything remotely cultural for at least 5 days... Bring on the tubing!